I just HAD to go over Riz Lateef yesterday evening.
There’s leaving your fiancée alone in front of the telly for ya.
Then I just had to.. get rid of my Kirkmorning-wood.
C-ah-ah-rol Kirkwood.
As regular as showers, her!
Mind if your pee would turn that umbrella’s colour though!

Then Michaela Tab+b, as it’s apparantly spelled, was on, getting some questions asked herself!
Final question: May I?
Which could also be red.. read as May 1.
Oh well, since that is more than a day, I might just get desperate.
Not that I’d do it over her.. you, if you’re visiting this site, only when I’m desperate.
Quiet the cont’rary!!
Putting a ball back never can take too long, especially when she’s on the top cushion, now can it! Bending over..
Neither can racking them up or cleaning a ball, although I have the suspicion they purposely don’t show too much of her in those situations.

Anyway, a mention should go to that tasty lass in the audience in the Hendry vs Day match.
If I had.. If she’d only be not so difficult to time it on.

–Michaela, your time starts..
NOW!
When you have a number 1, what would you be cleaning afterwards?
-The pink?
–Correct!
If a guy is really desperate, what colour would his pants turn in to?
-Blue.
–Correct
Guys might masturbate 2 you.
What side of you do they prefer?
-Back?
–It is in fact the front.
When they do it in bed, next to their girlfriend, what is the prefered way to do it?
-Quietly if they can..
–Correct, indeed. Ya don’t wanna wake up your girlfriend, now do ya!
Would I prefer six or sex?
-I’d say six times a week.
–Hmmm.. Not sure. Does wanking qualify as sex?
You might be correct.
Now.. you have 9.. points? to your tally, of which 3 this year (so far). Where do you rank?
-9?
–Correct!
When guys do.. that, what would they be playing with?
-Their sweety thing?
–Correct!
Calling you by your nick-name.
Which nick-name?
-Referee Eye-Candy?
–Correct!
It’s that time again. You’re on day.. ?
-2.
–You’ve started so you’ll finish..
(-I wish they were all finished.)

When Sunday Life started, Something for the Wank-end also was about to.. kick off?
Talking of which; Some-ONE found my blog with the search terms about Amanda Hamilton being pregna.. preggers.

I thought to go over both, as it’s about that time again for Louise Minchin to get some points on the board.
I went over Amanda, and Louise looked.. too serious after that?
Amanda clearly indicated with her index finger to leave it @ 1.
So I did.
Her just-come-out-of-the-shower appearance must have done it.

Helen Sk-oo-lton on newsround..
Something to do with learning or teaching.
Although with Helen that’ll be more like teasing!!
I could certainly learn it over her, and she wouldn’t have to teach me even!
I “learned it” already, though.
Shame. Especially when I see girls like her and Sonali.
Mohini?
Them teens have some great stuff for study.
You’d wish you were that age again, now don’t ya!
I think my first celebrity wank was over Edele from bew*tched, but I did it over college girls before that.
It did start this championship thing, though.

Twice I missed the ONE show.
Twice I’ve done it over Sonali.
Just missed out on Zoe on Blue Peter, and the other very wankable girls they hired.. had on.
So there she was.
After yesterday I wasn’t sure she’d be on as the main presenter.
They might not mind teens learning it over Sonali, and the other Newsround presenters, they sure don’t want them to get addicted!
She had a go of the size of my.. thingy, nearly got it right.
Not sure what she meant. Before or after?!
Anyway, it didn’t stay up.
It didn’t go all itchy-mini.
Shrunk.. but not all the way.

She’s got 2 consecutive now.
Maybe I shall keep a little form book.
Sonali; 2 this week.
She might add, mind!

Michaela Tab, referee eye-candy 2 you and me, refereeing today.
1 of the players had a bit of red in his hair (-do).
Don’t know about Michaela, she’s wearing clothes.
Might be a hint, as they’re black.
Might be dress code.
Anyway, she’s dressed to..
Very wanky indeed, not only if you have an uniform fetish.
She’s hot!
Her looks, her appearance..
Her voice.
Her.. being good in numbers?
She’d wank.. walk in on ya..
What’d she say?
‘Touching ball’ or ‘in hand’?
If you’d start doing it over her, she’d just say
-Now, compose yourself..
I don’t want to, really.
You look @ her front and she asks
-Back?
-Yes.. but let me finish this one first, please.
When you’re a piece of toilet paper that’d be a firm
-NO!
Or, NO WAY!
Side matters, you know.
Especially when you are a piece of toilet paper.
So, what number, Michaela?
-One.

Other numbers she can say with her lovely voice: 28 (like in (a) cycle), 3 (like in days)..
The number that she has this year, or indeed her aggregate(s) tally.

Add to that the things she actually said, like the
-Please don’t do the sweety thing..
No, love.. erm sweety?
And the thing when she said
-After the match..
Someone in the audience must have said
-I could wank over you.. (?)
That being her cool reply.

So, you go looking for her dressing room.
Found it. Let’s wank.. walk in on her.
-Oi, you don’t knock, do ya..
She’s smiling.
She’d better.
She’s the 1 who told me
-After the match.
So here I am!
She’s having a pee, is she?
Better ask!
-One.. putting up her finger as well.
-Clean them bits, please.. ?!
-Which reminds me, you haven’t red mine.. !

Now then.. I see something yellow..number 1? some pink.. well, obviously you DID wipe, I’m reading it now! .. blue pants.. oh, hang on, those are mine.. something black, must be your uniform..

So, after a couple more strokes, straight in the po.. sock, it.
Didn’t wipe its feet.
Though I might wipe it later.

She smiles.
The player forgot to shake her hand.
Shake.. now, that reminds me.
I’m off.
Got some strokes to practise.

Had only one over Amanda Hamilton.
Again.
Like last week.
Apologies accepted?
Unexpectedly had one over Donna Italiana, Lorena Bianchetti, she was so worthy today.
And had one over referee Eye-candy, Michaela Tab.
That’s 3 today, and I’m not entirely certain that’s enough..
Might have something to do with Susie Amy in me girlfriend’s closer.
Had one before kick-off, one @ half-time over her yesterday.
This snooker player with a bit red in his hairdo.. hair.
Michaela might have a bit of that, but we don’t know.
She’s got her clothes on.
But she COULD be on (it).
She’d not want us to know, now would she!

Christine is having a huge lead in the rankings.

I thought not to go over her, but I did, somehow.
Must have been all those instruments.
On Newsround as well, with that yammy Helen.
Like what she’s done to her.. appearance.
Not just the dark hair.
Drums, reccorders, clarinetts, violins, flutes.. Flute?
That reminds me..
So, done it over Christine anyhow, the change that she threw in the guitar cover being the final straw.. but not really.
And my change ended up in some sock.
I did it when she was alONE on the screen, when they showed her and focused on her.
She might have guessed.. known..

o o O O¹ (There might be guys c*ming over me now.. (?))
She might have guessed, but she might know that a certain Randy might.
I’m sceptic about her guessing, she might just know.
It would be naive of celebrities, or @ least some of them, to think there’s nobody playing with their *, while they do their thing.
She’s ONE of those.
One that is masturbated to, not one of the naive celebrities.

¹ Thought bubbles back

Amanda was hot today.
How the *¹ I didn’t go more than once over her..
Went over that gadget girl, though.
The caps.. CAPS in the title refer to Amanda, who’s a dead ringer for Ana Boulter.
Although today she was even hotter, as she looked like a cross between Ana and Kate Heavenor.
She’s done something for the weekend.. something about her looks.
Very hot appearance.
Maybe it’s her hair?
She was wearing black & blue..
Very much in common with me, her admirer.
Well, that’s a black shirt and blue jeans and blue pants.
Must have been, I was that desperate.
My girlfriend probably watching the London marathon.
She wouldn’t join in, I guess, being preggers.
She could, she’s soooo fit.
Must be all that jogging she does.

Then there was Suzi, but she got no points today.
Just in case Suzi would “google” herself and wonder what that is all about: Check out the wank rank, Suzi.
Or any other celebs that might end up here.
Like that italian babe, Lorena Bianchetti.

¹ Fill in a term yourself, please.
(sorry for any inconvenience caused)

How I didn’t.. squirt some juice.. deuce? over Lizzie today is beyond me.
She was ACE!!
Her bum, her boobs, her.. appearance, all A’s.
All very proportionate on top, what else could you wish for?
I need to get a few over Lizzie.
Tenn is a good tally, I think.
She might aim higher, mind!

And the report wasn’t short, was it?
Nowww.. That might be it!
She wasn’t wearing a short skirt, playing tennis.
That might just be the reason.

She might as well dress in something red next week.
Might just be to your advantage, love!
Well, the ball’s in her court.