Decided to smoke @ least less than a pack a day.
(Good, Randy!)
Now, I haven’t decided how many.
So far so good, but hey, the day is just half gone.
Took the day off today, which might make it more difficult to keep to that.
(So long ya keep to ur girl, Randy)
Want to pack it in completely eventually, but it’s a start!
(Sure, start/aim realistically)
It’s this..
(Go Randy.. let it out)
@*€§µ¬&.. # smoking ban.
(And yes, that one (#))
It’s everywhere..
Now, this morning there was this Hannah Moffat (?) on it.. on BBC Yorkshire, very nice lady, who did the weather fore cast as well.
No Lisa Gallagher.
(No, she was prob having a sleep in from her late night shifts..?)
Sure I’ll go over her, sooner I hope!
Missed Laura Tobin, who was on the other Local news bulletin.
I decided to go over her instead, but she wasn’t there next time!
Anyway, I bet myself to go over NewsRound if Spain won, which I will keep to with pleasure!
4-1 Sonali, 8-1 Helen, 14-1 Laura, with Lizzie or Ellie most likely not scheduled to be on it today.
Also onthis morning, Charlotte Church.
Now, imagine going to church.. sharing your sins.
Sinner:I’ve masturbated (they probably don’t know the meaning of the word wank in church) to Charlotte Church.
Vicar: What!!? How many times?
S: Just the once..
V: In total, or just the once over Charlotte Church?
S:(Thinks to him self: Tsa.. He’s having a laugh!
Tss.. there’s girls like Helen Yammm Skelton, Sonali Gud-ess, Tina O’Brien and you ‘d seriously ask..)
Then goes on: Now, I might have tossed ONE or two out over Christine Bleakley, have admired Helen Skelton, have lusted for Susannah Reid, spend some change over Fearne Cotton, had a 3 way fantasy over Jakki Degg, my dad keeps buying The Sun.. or was it my Max?
Not forgetting getting helping it down, twice! over, a very pregnant, Ellie Crisell, massaging meself to a fantastic orgasm over Laura Jones, getting off over Sonali Gudka, masurbating to Becky Jago, having a wank over Louise Lea(the)r, ejaculating all over Alesha Dixon’s picture, making it worthless in da process, having a Royal Flushing of some icing sugar over princess Rani of Jordan, before that last name putting me off, thinking of the model of that name.
All that after amyng straight @ Susi’s pic on the bathroom tiles, complimenting Sian Williams on her hot looks, sinning badly over Tina O’Brien, while watching that Girls Aloud DVD will book my place in hell straight away.
After all that, and the pocket stimulation over Fiona Bruce, who will join me in hell for wearing that short skirt, thus teasing me out of control, I think that wet spot it ended with, is just a minor offence?
I forecast another couple of points for that will be coming from Lisa Gallagher. I might guess that any points gained for keeping to me fiancé, or avoiding any unwanted pregnancies won’t help my cause?
V: Is that all?
S: If you mean the sins I practised, yes.
But doesn’t it say in the bible that sinning in the mind is just as bad?!
V: Have you..?
S: Only thought of having Fiona Bruce teasing me into hell with her short skirt.. After which I caught fire, which was forecasted to be rained out shortly by Lisa Gallagher.. What has she done to end up here I thought, thinking that she was really hot, before realizing I was still on fire!
So Susann-ah came quickly and peed it out.
If I put myself on fire, will you do that again?
-..in fifteen minutes, she said.
Dinner’d be ready soon, as I noticed Sonali Gudka chewing it already, so I would just have to swallow it.
The bath was also being filled up, Helen Skelton’s turn to dribble, some pudding bouncing, just like her boobs..
(on SR)
Then I came out of the bath, went into the sleeping room and found my girlfriend playing with a candle..
That wouldn’t burn now anyway, so wet as it must have got.
The things that she proposed will make certain she accompanies me in hell, and if not, the things she apparently does with the dog, bottles, carrots, cucumbers, bananas.. I always wondered what that recipe was.. will get her there for sure.
Who knows whom you’ll meat.. meet up there.
Susannah Reid, gorgeous as she might be, but I never would have thought of her doing.. that sort of thing.
And it wasn’t just a one off thing, just try it.
She’s got three kids, mind!
Now, surely Fiona Bruce doesn’t have an Auntie Whatshername, or she wouldn’t wear such short skirts?!!
Who knows, Cat Deeley might be the only cat dogs really like?
Zoe Salmon might have helped this wheelchair guy, when he got clearly eroused by her?
(Did he?)
The bin person at that tv station might suck tampons of celebrities?
(They stay @ home on those days, Randy!)
Who knows what happens between closed doors, including the church?
(Now.. Randy..!)
I for sure wouldn’t think of Stephanie (Lazytown) as sexy, or erousing.
There might be others, like that american from Lakenheath.
And letting someone else get the blame, WHO THEY KNOW IS INNOCENT.
Or the lovely Sally Anne, taken monsterously.
Oh, how sinful wa.. masurbation is, and you’ll rot in hell.
But for murderers, the like, there’s always room.
Oh, how they just regret it, and take their place in heaven..
V: Now.. now..
S: Yeah, I’m leaving. I know.. Masturbating is not a crime. It’s an act of love, respect..
Appreciation of beauty, of someone’s free will or significant other.
I’m off.. I hope you get off, too..
off my back.
That’ll be 423,980 Our Father’s.
If I can get it in my schedule, in between giving my girlfr..
(You’re planning to cut back on fags.. remember?!)
Our Father, Who’s in Heaven..
again, though I can’t remember having been to Yorkshire..